Rules for visiting NZ's South Island are:

1. Pull your pants up. You look like an idiot.

2. Turn your cap right, your head ain't crooked.

3. Let's get this straight: it's called a 'gravel road.'

I drive a Ute because I want to. No matter how slow you

drive, you're gonna get dust on your Lexus. Drive it or get

out of the way.

4. They are cattle. That's why they smell like cattle. They

smell like money to us. Get over it. Don't like it? SH1 goes

north, find it and Bugger off.

5. So you have a $80,000 car. We're impressed. We have

$250,000 Harvesters that are driven only 3 weeks a year.

6. Every person in the South Island waves. It's called being

friendly. Try to understand the concept.

7. If that cell phone rings while a bunch of

geese/pheasants/ducks/quail are coming in during the season,

we WILL shoot it outta your hand. You better hope you don't

have it up to your ear at the time...

8. Yeah. We eat trout, salmon, deer and duck....... You

really want sushi and caviar? It's available at the corner

bait shop.

9. The 'Opener' refers to the first day of duck

or fishing season. It's a religious holiday, we will observe

it.

10. We open doors for women. That's applied to all women,

regardless of age.

11. No, there's no 'Vegetarian Special' on the menu. Order

steak, or you can order the Chef's Salad and pick off the 2

pounds of ham and turkey.

12. When we set a table, there are three main dishes: meats,

vegetables and breads. We use three spices: salt, pepper,

and Watties tomato sauce! Oh, yeah - we don't care what you

folks in Ponsonby call that stuff you eat... IT AIN'T REAL

CHILLI!!

13. You bring 'Coke' into my house, it better be brown, wet

and served over ice.... You bring 'Mary Jane' into my house,

she better be cute, know how to shoot, drive a truck, and

have long hair...

14. College and High School Rugby is as important here as

The All Blacks, The Highlanders and The Crusaders and a heap

more fun to watch.

15. Yeah, we have golf courses - but don't hit the water

hazards - it spooks the fish.

16. Turn down that blasted car stereo! That thumpity -thump

crap ain't music. We don't want to hear it anymore than we

want to see your boxers! Refer back to #1!

17.. For role models refer to the "Mainland Cheese" and

"Speights" boys ................. 'good on ya, mate'!




So, Leute, spätestens wenn ihr mich dann mal besuchen kommt, werdet ihr dieses Wissen hier gekonnt anwenden können.
Vor allem zu beachten sind hierbei die Regeln: 3, 4, 6, 7,
10, 14, 16

hab euch alle lieb :)
Elly